Nature envelopes me and the winds whisper words with no consonants into my ears.
Without consonants the words are meaningless to my head, but my heart understands as I fall asleep.
The sleep is not peaceful.
It is full of images of deep greens and bright blues.
As I allow myself to lose control, a splash of orange flashes through my body.
I have lost control of my being, and the night takes the helm.
The night attempts to control my mind, but my heart never lets go of the self control I dream I own.
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Monday, November 8, 2010
Time Change
I love it when the time falls back and I have more time to sleep.
This morning I woke up an hour early, and lay back in bed contemplating when I "should" get up.
My roommate woke up, looked at the clock, swore, and nearly got up. Then she remembered that she hadn't switched her clock back.
Such is daylight savings.
Last year, when the time sprung forward, I was very careful because I was about to head on a spring break trip, and I didn't want to be late for the vans.
I woke up before the sun had risen, because someone was calling my extension. The first words from the mysterious person's mouth was, "Happy daylight savings!"
I was late for the bus.
As quickly as I could I ran around the room and grabbed everything I needed.
My roommate had woken up when the phone rang, and she was confused because we had both been sure her phone (our alarm clock) would spring forward with the change. Apparently it hadn't because she hadn't opened it.
But such is daylight savings.
This morning I woke up an hour early, and lay back in bed contemplating when I "should" get up.
My roommate woke up, looked at the clock, swore, and nearly got up. Then she remembered that she hadn't switched her clock back.
Such is daylight savings.
Last year, when the time sprung forward, I was very careful because I was about to head on a spring break trip, and I didn't want to be late for the vans.
I woke up before the sun had risen, because someone was calling my extension. The first words from the mysterious person's mouth was, "Happy daylight savings!"
I was late for the bus.
As quickly as I could I ran around the room and grabbed everything I needed.
My roommate had woken up when the phone rang, and she was confused because we had both been sure her phone (our alarm clock) would spring forward with the change. Apparently it hadn't because she hadn't opened it.
But such is daylight savings.
Sunday, November 7, 2010
My Emotional Self
I have had quite a week. There have been ups and downs and highs and lows. I have gone running, I have danced, and I have sung. It has been quite a time.
I am beginning to wonder how I can take myself solely on an emotional journey, and not pull other people in to my questioning. Is it a bad thing to include other people in my emotional travels? I don't want to drive people away from me by my questions, and I don't want to frighten people when I gain intensity. I don't want to become dependent on others either. I don't want to constantly search. Especially when I have no idea what I am searching for. I want something more, but I have no idea what this "more" is, and I don't know what it will look like.
I wonder, wonder, wonder, where can I put all these emotions and thoughts? Where can I express myself.
How can I just be?
I am beginning to wonder how I can take myself solely on an emotional journey, and not pull other people in to my questioning. Is it a bad thing to include other people in my emotional travels? I don't want to drive people away from me by my questions, and I don't want to frighten people when I gain intensity. I don't want to become dependent on others either. I don't want to constantly search. Especially when I have no idea what I am searching for. I want something more, but I have no idea what this "more" is, and I don't know what it will look like.
I wonder, wonder, wonder, where can I put all these emotions and thoughts? Where can I express myself.
How can I just be?
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